Funny Dracula Jokes, Dracula Vampire Jokes, Halloween Jokes

Funny Dracula Jokes

Costume Craze: What will you be for Halloween?

Funny Dracula Jokes

 Don’t let the night scare you ever again once you have read these funny Dracula jokes. And be brave and stick your neck out and share them with your friends!

What was the Dracula like when he become a Californian hippie?
He was ghoul man. Real ghoul!

Why does Dracula have no friends?
Because he’s a pain in the neck!

What is Dracula’s favourite sport?
Bat-minton!

Why does Dracula live in a coffin?
Because the rent is below living standards!

What is Dracula’s favourite pudding?
Fresh sucking leeches and high pitch screams!

What is Dracula’s favourite sports drink?
Readyneck!

Why did Dracula never marry?
He always want to become a bat-chelor!

Why did Dracula become a bank?
To deal with every day suckers!

What did Dracula call his daughter?
Bloody Mary!

What did Dracula call his son?
Vein-killa!

What does Dracula say to the mirror?
Terror, terror on the wall! Who has the best bite of all?

What’s Dracula’s family car called?
A mobile blood unit!

What’s Dracula’s sports car called?
The fangster!

What type of coffee does Dracula’s order when at a coffee shop?
A de-coffiin-ated coffee!

What is words are written on Dracula’s family crest?
“Please Give Blood Generously”

What does Mrs Dracula say to Mr Dracula when he leaves for work in the evening?
Hope you bite into some good suckers!

Why was Dracula disappointed with his new born son?
Because he fainted at the sight of blood!

Why did Dracula go to school?
To learn the alphabat!

Why was Dracula son thought as being polite?
He always said fangs you!

What does Dracula say when he down at the mall?
Well, I fangcy that, that, that and that guy over there!

If you want to know more about Dracula what do you have to do?
Join his fang club online.

Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
He had fang decay.

Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
To remove some guys neck!

What happened at the Dracula’s funeral?
All the blood relations flew in!

What did Dracula say to the Wolf man?
You look like you’re going to the dogs!

What did Dracula say to the skeleton?
There’s not a single meal in you!

What did Dracula say when the ghoul told him a Halloween joke?
Ghoul blimey!

What dating website does Dracula use to pick up?
Neck-romancer.com!

How does Dracula like to have his food served?
In bite-sized pieces!

Where does Dracula like to take is holidays?
The Isle of Fright!

What did Dracula do to stop his son biting the furniture?
He bought him a pet giraffe!

What is Dracula’s pet dog called?
Bloodhound!

Where did Dracula go to first in America?
New-fang-land!

What city does Dracula Chinese family live in?
Fanghai!

Why does Dracula eat out at fast food hamburger shops?
Because he knows that he won’t get a stake.

What happened to Dracula after he ate a sheep?
He felt real baaaaaaaaaaad.

Why was Dracula a good politician?
Because every time anyone asked them a question he would come up with a biting reply!

What building does Dracula own in America?
The Vampire State Building!

When Dracula goes to Los Vegas, What game does he like to play?
High Stake Poker!!!

For more vampire jokes and vampire humor goto our vampire page here!

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