Black Cat Jokes

Black Cat Jokes

With a huge cat-a-logue of funny black cat jokes for Halloween.
You are sure to be laughing up fur balls by the end of reading these!

Q: What is a black cat’s favorite color?
A: Purrrrrr-ple!

Q: Which one of your pets should you scare on Halloween?
A: Scare-de-cat!

Q: What is worst than raining black cats and bloodhounds?
A: Hailing taxi cabs!

Q: What animals are the best pets?
A: Black cats, because they are purr-fect!

Q: What is a black cat’s favorite song?
A: Three Blind Mice!

Q: What kind of cats like to go bowling?
A: Black Alley cats!

Q: What did the black cat have for breakfast?
A: Mice Crispies!

Black Cat Jokes

Q: Why did the black cat put the letter “M” into the fridge?
A: Because it turns “ice” into a whole lot of “mice”!

Q: What looks like half a black cat?
A: The other half!

Q: What do you get if you cross a black cat with a whit oak tree?
A: A black and white cat-a-logue!

Q: Why do black cats never shave?
A: Because 9 out of 10 black cats prefer whiskas!

Q: Why are black cats such good singers?
A: They’re very mewsical!

Q: What is cleverer than a talking black cat?
A: A spelling bee!

Q: How do you know when your black cat’s done cleaning herself?
A: She’s smoking a cigarette!

Q: What do you call the black cat that was caught by the police?
A: The purrpatrator!

Q: What do you call a witches black cat that drinks vinegar?
A: A sour puss!

Q: What do you call it when a witches black cat falls off a broomstick?
A: A catastrophe!

Q: Where does a black cat get its best Halloween humor from?
A: The purrfect place Halloweenjokes.com!

Q: What did the black cat say when he lost all his money?
A: I’m paw!

Q: What do people in England call little black cats?
A: Kittens!

Q: Why did the black cat join the Red Cross?
A: Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit-ten!

Q: How is Halloween cat food sold?
A: Usually purr can!

Q: What do you call a witches cat that never comes when he’s called?
A: Impussible!

Q: When is it unlucky to see a black cat?
A: When your a mouse!

Q: What is a black octopus?
A: Two black cats fighting!

Q: Why was the black cat so small?
A: Because it only drank condensed milk!

Q: What is a French black cat’s favorite pudding?
A: Chocolate mousse!

Black Cat Jokes

 

Q: What’s the unluckiest kind of black cat to have?
A: A catastrophe!

Q: What did the black cat say to the fish?
A: I’ve got a bone to pick with you!

Q: What do you get if you cross a witches cat with Father Christmas?
A: Santa Claws!

Q: What did the witch call her black cat?
A: Black death!

Q: Did you hear about the black cat who swallowed the ball of orange yarn?
A: She had Halloween mittens!

Q: Did you hear about the black cat who ran up the big phone bill?
A: She called Persian-to-Persian!

Q: What do you call a chubby black kitty?
A: A fat cat!

Q: What do you call a cross between a black cat and a skunk?
A: A mew pew!

Q: How do you spell mousetrap in three letters?
A: C-A-T!

Q: What do black cats drink in the afternoon?
A: Kit-tea!

Q: What was the first black cat to fly?
A: Kitty-hawk!

Q: What do you get if you cross a hungry black cat and a canary?
A: A cat that isn’t hungry any more!

Q: What kind of baths do black cats like best?
A: Milk baths!

Q: How do you get milk from a black cat?
A: Steal its saucer!

Q: Where does a black cat hang its wash?
A: On a feline!

Q: When is a black cat most likely to run out of the house?
A: When the door is open!

Q: What do you get if you cross a black kitten with a vampire stake?
A: A cat-er-pillar!

Q: What do you call a black cat surrounded by a hundred mice?
A: Purr-fectly happy!

Q: Why couldn’t the black cat go to the fancy party?
A: Her fur coat was at the cleaners!

Q: What do you call a black cat who does tricks on Halloween?
A: A magic kit-teen!

Q: What do you call a cat penny?
A: A purr cent!

Black Cat Jokes

 

Q: How do you know if a black cat is ready to kill?
A: I feel 100 purrrcent!

Q: Why did the black cats sell their homes?
A: The neighborhood had gone to the dogs!

Q: Did you ever see a catfish?
A: No! How did she hold the rod and reel?

Q: How do you make a black cat dizzy?
A: Give it a tailspin!

Q: Which game did the black cat want to play with the mouse?
A: Catch!

Q: What is a black cat’s favourite dessert?
A: Mice pudding!

Q: How do you mail a black cat?
A: Use fur-class mail!

Q: If there were ten black cats in a haunted house and one jumped out, how many would be left?
A: None! because they were all copycats!

Q: What’s the difference between a black cat and a comma?
A: One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other a pause at the end of the its clause!

Q: What do you use to comb a black cat?
A: A catacomb!

Q: What has more lives than a black cat?
A: A frog because it croaks every night!

Q: Where does a black cat go when it loses its tail?
A: The retail store!

Q: Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of black cats?
A: Because each of them was guilty of purrjury!

Q: Why did the black cat run from the tree?
A: Because it was afraid of the bark!

Q: How do black cats end a fight?
A: They hiss and make up!

Q: What does a black cat do when it gets mad?
A: It has a hissy fit!

Q: Did you hear about the cat who drank 13 bowls of water?
A: He set a new lap record!

Q: What kind of car does a fat black cat drive?
A: A Catillac!

Black Cat Jokes

More Black Cat Jokes

Q: What is the cat’s favorite magazine?
A: Good Mousekeeping!

Q: Why don’t black cats play poker in the jungle?
A: Too many cheetahs!

Q: What did the baby black cat want to grow up to be?
A: A puma!

Q: How does the black cat always get its own way?
A: With some friendly purrsuasion!

Q: What is a black cat’s favorite subject in school?
A: HISStory!

Q: Where is one place that your black cat can sit, but you can’t?
A: Your lap!

Q: Why are black cats better than babies?
A: Because you only have to change a litter box once a day!

Q: How many cats can you put into an haunted house?
A: Only one. After that, the haunted house isn’t empty!

Q: Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you?
A: That depends on whether you’re a man or a mouse!

Q: Why did the black cat put oil on the mouse?
A: Because it squeaked!

Q: If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on?
A: Their paws!

Learn More About Black Cats

Bad Black Cat Superstition

Throughout the Middle Ages, bad black cat superstitions took hold in Europe. Often people would assigned sinister qualities to black cats. From Normans to Germanic people believed that, like the black raven, a black cat was a sign that a death would soon occur to themself or their families. They even thought that if a black cat crossed your path it was very bad luck. The fears about black cats spread throughout Europe over time and, sadly, mass killings of black cats took place. Although certain areas of Europe, such as places in the UK, had some positive black cat superstitions, the black feline was often misunderstood and mistreated. Find out more about black cats here!

Black Cat Jokes

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