Jokes For Halloween

Jokes For Halloween – Puns For Halloween

There are hundreds and hundreds Halloween Jokes on Halloweenjokes.com. Here are just a quick few to get you into the Halloween mood.

Q: What time is it when you see kids in costumes, a spooky house, deadeye looking candy and hear trick-or-treat?
A: Halloween!

Q: What runs right around a cemetery but doesn’t move?
A: A fence!

Q: What is a ghoul’s favourite Halloween drink?
A: Slime juice!

Q: What do you do when you see a ghost?
A: Run away of course!

Q: What do you call two witches that share the same room?
A: Broom mates!

Q: What do like to read on Halloween?
A: Halloween joke BOO-ks.

Q: Where do kids go to read free online Halloween Jokes?
A: HalloweenJokes.com!

Q: Who won this year’s Halloween skeleton beauty contest?
A: No body, again!

Q: What does a witch ask for first when booking for a hotel?
A: Do you have broom service?

Q: What do you call very serious rocks?
A: Grave stones!

Q: Why did the vampire’s lunch give him heart pains?
A: It was a well done stake sandwich!

Q: What did the vampire say to the Invisible Man?
A: ‘Long time, no see!’

Q: Where does a vampire keep his money?
A: In a blood bank!

Q: How do ghosts like their eggs?
A: Terror-fried!

Q: What did the really ugly man do for a living?
A: He posed for Halloween masks!

Q: What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
A: Lots of blood tests!

Q: What do you call a nervous witch?
A: A twitch!

Q: Why can’t Dracula play baseball?
A: He lost his bat!

Q: What do fishermen say on Halloween?
A: ‘Trick-or-trout!’

Q: What would you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman?
A: A dead ringer!

Q: How was Frankenstien’s birth?
A: Shocking!

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton dance at the party?
A: He had no body to dance with!

Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A: At the casketeria!

Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist!

Q: Where did the goblin throw the football?
A: Over the ghoul line!

Q: Why doesn’t Dracula mind the doctor looking at his throat?
A: Because of the coffin!

Q: Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?
A: They have no body to love!

Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the Boos!

Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life!

Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet!

Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck!

Q: Who doesn’t wear a mask on Halloween?
A: Karen!

Q: How do you fix a broken pumpkin?
A: A pumpkin patch!

Q: Do you want to hear a joke about ghosts?
A: That’s the spirit!

Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts!

Q: Why did the team of witches lose the softball game?
A: Their bats kept flying away!

Q: Where do werewolves get there Halloween Puns?
A: They get their Halloween Jokes at Halloweenjokes.com!

Q: What do you call two witches who live together?
A: Broom-mates!

Q: What do you call a mummy who wins the lottery?
B: A lucky stiff!

Q: How did the owl kill the chicken?
A: With a bit of F.owl play!

Q: Why is that cemetery so popular?
A: People have always been dying to get in!

Q: Why does Dracula live in a coffin?
A: Because the rent is below living standards!

Q: What did the zombie girl say to the zombie boy?
A: “Are you going to kiss me or rot?”

Q: What happened to the man who got behind on payments to his exorcist?
A: He got repossessed!

Q: What do you become when you are in a horror movie?
A: Dead!

Q: What is a ghost’s favorite meal?
A: Spook-ghetti!

Q: What is a baby ghost’s favorite game?
A: Peek-a-boo!

Q: Why does Dracula love reading Halloween jokes on Halloweenjokes.com?
A: He is a real sucker for them!

Q: Hear about the clown that liked saying Halloween Jokes?
A: He was booed of the staged!

Q: Why didn’t the coffee bean go trick or treating?
A: Because it was grounded!

Q: What do birds say on Halloween?
A: Trick or tweet!

Q: What does Bigfoot say when he asks for candy?
A: Trick or feet!

Q: Why was the Jack-o’-lantern forgetful?
A: Because he’s empty-headed!

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the Halloween dance?
A: He had no body to go with!

Q: What do you call a skeleton who won’t work?
A: Lazybones!

Find more funny Halloween Jokes here!

Scarecrow Jokes  |  Witch Jokes | Skeleton Jokes | Ghost Jokes

Zombie Jokes | Spider Jokes | Monster Jokes | Halloween Candy Jokes